ON DEMOLITION... AND CREATION

I've never liked building projects.

When it comes to things that require trips to Lowe's, heavy equipment, wood, drywall, exacting measurements, Spackle, hammering, etc... I just don't like it. And it's not just the physical labor or the dust in my lungs afterward. I just always feel like I can't build anything perfectly (I can't), and at the same time, I also feel like things should be built perfectly. So I'm really hesitant with that kind of work, because, when I try to create, it brings destruction as well. When I paint something intentionally, I paint something else unintentionally. When I carve out some drywall on purpose, I carve out other drywall on accident... It always quickly becomes clear that perfection is impossible for me to achieve. But if my fear of imperfection is such that it causes me to do nothing... well, then... nothing gets done.

On the other hand, when you watch "handy" people - even professional builders - and take note of what they all have in common, you find that it's not so much how flawless their skill level is, or how perfectly they can craft anything they set themselves to making... It's more their tenacity which makes them so good. It's their ability to just bluntly keep on keeping on. And even though something more ideal could be conceived of, they don't let that fact paralyze them. They just build.

It's the same in all aspects of life.

There is no reward without risk. No construction without destruction. No new growth without the old withering away. We can't conceive of fresh concepts without first allowing our preconceptions to fracture, and we can't typically raise our expectations without first challenging our assumptions. In short... "You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs."

In an upside-down kingdom where the first are last and the true leaders serve, we are broken to heal. Brought low to ascend new heights. Humbled to be exalted, we lose our lives to find them, and sacrifice ourselves to truly live. We see our fantasies crumble so that new visions might take hold. We endure nightmares to find beautiful dreams. We traverse valleys to reach mountaintops, and contend with shadows to bask in the light... No one should ever kid themselves into thinking otherwise, because the kingdom of God will always make its own foundations. It will not be tacked-on to existing kingdoms, because it stands on its own.

And none of us will ever see with heaven's eyes unless we first come to grips with who the hell we are.